I remember there were times during football games in high school where I seemed to function independent of conscious thought. My body was in rhythm with it's environment and acted without restraint. I had the the perfect economy of motion. I was invincible. (You may cite my several concussions as a counterargument to my claims of invincibility, but my response would be that I have no recollection of these purported concussive events. No really, I don't remember them at all.)
Oddly enough, I was reminded of this economy of motion at the VA hospital the other day. To briefly acquaint you with the Vets, they are a wonderful group of guys (mainly guys anyway) who performed a remarkable service for the rest of us and are now suffering the mental and physical consequences of their efforts. Diabetes, heart disease, obesity, hypertension, depression and numerous other ailments run rampant throughout the system. Despite the seriousness of their disease states, the Vets are oddly robust. They seem able to survive an acute decompensation of their physical status much better than most of the rest of us could. And when I ask a Vet what type of medical problems he has, the majority of the time he will respond with "none". True, certain diseases in this group are so common they almost seem like they are not diseases at all (if everyone had diabetes, would we have a name for it?), but they appear truly unaware that anything could be wrong. Or maybe they are ware but just don't care, brushing me off with "do what ya gotta do doc."
It makes me wonder if they have a certain economy of motion to their lives. Having experienced an intensity that is not replicable, life now simply comes to them. They move through it with a rhythm that lacks self-awareness. Life comes and goes and they accept and release it. The question that follows is, does this lack of self-consciousness effort strengthen an individual? Is a lack of a self-concept and thus a fear of loss of that self, the key to prolonging life?
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